
Hello Cozy Family,
One of the most common concerns I hear is: Will sleep coaching affect my attachment with my baby? And, Is it the same as the Cry It Out (CIO) method?
Let me reassure you: your baby’s attachment to you is deeply rooted in your emotional availability and responsiveness to their needs. As a mother and someone passionate about helping families thrive, I’m committed to strengthening those bonds—not weakening them.
Strong Attachment is My Priority
I do not use the CIO or “extinction” methods in my program. Instead, I focus on holistic approaches that respect your child as a whole person while helping you make healthy, positive changes.
Attachment is built through responsiveness, not specific parenting practices like breastfeeding, co-sleeping, or babywearing. While these can be helpful, they won’t guarantee a strong bond if you’re feeling burned out, emotionally unavailable, or unable to be present with your child.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, irritable, or “touched out,” it’s okay—this doesn’t mean your attachment is broken. It simply means you may need support and change. Prioritizing healthy sleep can restore your emotional and mental health, allowing you to feel closer, more present, and more attuned to your child.
Crying and Change
Crying is a natural form of communication and emotional expression for babies, toddlers, and even adults. It’s important to remember that crying during responsive sleep coaching is not harmful. Research shows that gentle, supportive sleep methods do not negatively affect attachment or emotional development.
Change can feel uncomfortable for both parents and babies because it’s unfamiliar. Our brains naturally resist change to keep us in a state of safety—even if the current situation isn’t working well. This discomfort doesn’t mean the change is wrong; it just takes time to adjust.
With a solid, supportive plan in place, you can help your child navigate these changes while staying responsive and comforting throughout the process. Yes, there may be some tears, but this isn’t the same as CIO. You’ll be there to offer reassurance every step of the way.
If Crying Feels Overwhelming
It’s natural to feel triggered by your baby’s cries—that’s how we’re wired to respond. But if you feel overly distressed or compelled to stop all crying, it might help to reflect on where that reaction is coming from. Are you attaching past experiences, trauma, or social media stories to your baby’s emotions?
It’s important to teach our children that all emotions—positive and negative—are safe to express. As their guides, we provide boundaries and reassurance, helping them learn to regulate their emotions while knowing they are loved and supported.
My Approach
I’ve designed a program that minimizes crying as much as possible while focusing on responsiveness, comfort, and your child’s overall well-being. Sleep is a gift to the entire family, and healthy rest will help you feel more connected and present with your little one.
If you’re ready to make changes and prioritize rest for your family, I’m here to help. Let’s work together to create a plan that supports your needs and strengthens your bond with your child.
With love,
Onyi (Cozysleeps)
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